Diddums

So it's a load of wank. Iiterally a walking simulatorm trying to be edgy and amazeballs by being pretty with weird and stupid shit thrown in. This should've been a movie, not a game.

Ha, funny story. When I moved to London, my hand luggage was literally my PC. No jokes. I took the side panel off, removed the graphics card so it didn't flop around, and carried it with me like that. No questions asked at all, but then I'm sexy AF so maybe the airport security took a shine to me, who knows. The people in the plane were clearly impressed by my ability to bring an entire PC on to an aircraft, they couldn't stop looking at me, presumably due to my marvelous ingenuity and not because I delayed their flight. That's not the funny bit though, the funny part was that I had a packet of tobacco with me, and in that pack was a small baggy of weed which the security fellas kindly removed from my person because they're haters. When I got to London that pack of tobacco vanished in to a suitcase or whatever when I bought a pack of fags. It was only about 4 months after moving here that I found it again, and doing that emo memories bollocks that we do, I had a little fiddle and found another bag of weed in it. That was a fucking good saturday. Anyways. As long as your PC is put together well, I'd recommend removing the graphics card and packing it well, it'll be fine.

All your asses? kicked 'em. Every fucking one.

I don't recall seeing this name before. Introduce yourself soldier!

Shut up Adam.

Your mum is a gta race night

Like fuck are Activision suddenly gonna become good guys. Where there's money, there's a way for Activision to extract it. Of course the blame doesn't entirely lie at Activision's feet, it's the dumb cunt gamers who spend all the money on this shit in the first place. Close the tap and they'll soon move on to other things. Unfortunately gamers are in general dumb fucks who keep spending money on stupid shit so the Megacorp Inc publishers will always be there to milk it. I wonder when they're releasing the Celestial Steed for WoW Classic.

Well this is a complete and utter clusterfuck, isn't it? I kept quiet on it at first because this was obviously such an unprecedented action about such a complicated subject that has no place in video games that I didn't really blame Blizzard's PR team for battening down the hatches as quickly as possible, I imagine there was a lot of panic at Blizzard HQ when it happened and a lot of "omg wtf do we do????". I gave them the benefit of the doubt thinking they'd sort it out correctly but it seems all they've done is reduce the bans to 6 months, although they let the fella keep his money. What they should've done is gone "shit, sorry guys, we panicked for a bit and went in to full damage control mode until we figured out every angle on the situation, we've rescinded the bans, awarded the winnings and let things carry on as normal, but please be aware that our events are meant for entertainment purposes only, we've implemented a policy to prevent this from happening again and we'd appreciate it if all our players, commentators and viewers could respect this" Done. "Fair play" they'd say. "Well done Blizz, we respect your honesty" they'd say. But no, everyone's burning down the house because of Blizzard's inability to maintain a proper PR element. Idiots. Will it stop be playing WoW? Well, put it this wasy: If your crack dealer voted leave and you were remain, would you stop smoking his crack? No? Me neither.

I had this the other day too, with our Devolo homeplug system. I ended up doing a complete factory reset on the whole system which resolved it. Fuck, I should've sent you some networking goodies too, didn't even think of it!

Hello! Welcome to the board, please leave your brain at the door, it won't be needed. I am pleasantly surprised to see you're not a bot, it's not often we get normal people on here so I would like to extend you the warmest of welcomes and wish you a pleasant stay. Please read all the warning signs, we accept no responsibility for you accidentally shoving a demo disc up your chocolate starfish. Thanks for posting this game, I think it looks pretty decent to be honest, I'll certainly be giving it a look in when it hits!

Well it's quite simple really, and all boils down to one thing: It's a shame that people put wealth before the wellbeing of others. Make mo mistake I am driven by money, and will never stop earning it, but I also like to think I'm a fairly generous person at times, and what's mine, is also everyone else's. You gotta pay for my chocolate starfish though, nobody gets that for free.

This is who they selected as their spokesman for NATIONAL FUCKING TELEVISION! No. Sorry. They had a golden opportunity handed to them on a silver platter and only reinforced my opinions that they’re all wastes of space who don’t really give a fuck. Useless parasites, the lot of them.

Let's be honest, all these extinction rebellion people are a bunch of attention seeking, time rich retards who have found a way to be the center of attention by fucking off every other person they can. None of them give a shit about the environment or extinction, they're all too lazy and stupid to find other ways to justify their pathetic existence so they mob up like racist football thugs and make as much of a cunt of themselves as they can. Meanwhile those who actually DO give a shit are running effective campaigns, getting the community involved, promoting recycling, cleaning up the oceans, etc. If someone were to come up with a profitable way to allow businesses to make money AND help our environment they'd be Oprah rich overnight, and I'm sure the hive mind of XR could probably rustle up a few braincells to at least stimulate and provoke thought in the field, but nah,vfuck all that, let's go and piss off the very people we're trying to convince to side with us. That's definitely gonna work, isn't it? There are TONS of little changes happening, but these idiots want it all done overnight. Paying for plastic bags helped, banning plastic straws helped, Sainsbury's now has reusable produce bags, changing emissions laws on vehicles has helped, I can go on and on. I wonder how many of these successful campaigns have gone "yeah, we did that because some dirty unemployed scum were camping in a street and pissing in the bushes". I'll certainly have a guess: none. There's no denying that shit needs to happen but there's also no denying that it's happening. There's also no denying that these idiots are having an adverse effect on any person I've spoken to about it (apart from one, who's hot AF, but anyway), so what they think they're achieving and what they're actually achieving are so far apart that the term delusional doesn't even cover it. I reckon we round them all up, stick them on proper oldschool environmentally friendly ships made of wood and oars, and let them row all the way to China and India where their oh-so-merry intentions can be put on display right in the middle of the world's most polluting industries. See how long they stick to their guns then. Just look at that dipshit who went on telly dressed as a broccoli. Zero fucking clue what he was talking about, zero scientific evidence for claims he couldn't even explain, refused to reveal his identity, just sat there thinking he was funny when he was literally just revealing his true self to the world, as someone who's just in it for a laugh m8, lol. And this is what 99% of these cunts are like. If we want to start making changes can we start by culling these dumb fucks so we reduce our carbon footprint?

New Content™

Fuckin all blacks. Didn’t help that I was sat in a barber’s chair on Saturday afternoon when a smug fuck in an All Black shirt came and sat in the seat next to me. The japs are a force to be reckoned with, make no mistake. We made a grave error of underestimating them last WC and learned from it. It’s gonna be a good cup, for sure.

I think I need to admit to myself that private games aside, I'm done with CoD. It just revs me up too much.

Spawn. Die. Spawn. Run a meter. Die. Spawn. Die. I had zero chance last night, it was so obvious, when people are in point blank shotgun range and manage to ads and kill me withvan assault rifle before I can even raise my shotgun, the game is fucked. Cod has always been a case of he-who-is-host-wins but it was just too much last night. I had literally zero chance. Fuck that.

Stop whining. Reinstall it. Get online. Spank noobs. Laugh. Cry. Drink. LOLs. Whatever. See you online tonight.

See you online tonight then. I'll bring a launcher to shoot down the UAVs, easy points.

If there's anyone I haven't offended let me know, we still have time!

@techno told me to play the game and do a review. I wanted to do a video review but I have a good career now and my online persona certainly isn't compatible with it, so here it is in writing. I know there's a thread for it but I'm fucking fabulous so I deserve my own thread. Initial thoughts! In this year's episode of please-keep-these-cunts-out-of-all-my-other-games comes a bit of a resurgence of old, no more flying, wallrunning, only a bit of parkour and the usual camping from the same twats who all seem to have fucked controllers going by their inability to move anywhere. CoD being CoD, every single soldier is exactly the same height, which is conveniently about an inch taller than every obstruction on the map. It's almost as if the designers have designed the game around people just poking their heads out from barriers and shooting you from their forehead mounted gun. The don't-worry-corner-I'll-defend-you cunts are now joined by a seemingly whole new breed of CoD player, who shall now be referred to as don't-worry-window-my-claymore-and-I-will-defend-you! It's no surprise how much I absolutely fucking detest the CoD community, but we need CoD, and we need Fortnite for exactly the same reason, to keep them out of anything else. These career Dorito eating, mountain dew sucking please-mom-one-more-round motherfuckers deserve this irritating cunt of a game. It caters to their cheap bullshit perfectly, with dark corners, the aforementioned perfect height obstacles, windows and maps which promote these legless fucks to sit in corners with their shotguns. I could almost hear the salt from their delicious tears when they found out that their usual look-at-me noscoping bollocks is gone, but there are more than enough ways in the game to find a way to shove a whistle up their arse and fart. The maps are decent enough, @phil bottle will probably have a whinge about the Hackney map not being stabby enough to be authentic, the cave map fucking sucks, the only way to succeed is to stay out of the cave because you can bet your bottom dollar that there are two pixels of some cunt sticking out from a rock on the other end of the cave scoped in on the door you just walked in to just waiting to catch you with your safety on and then brag as if he's just stopped King Fucking Kong from stomping all over Los Angeles. Congratulations, you waited 27 minutes for someone to walk past so you could catch him off guard and then killed him. You absolute fucking hero you. The guns feel decent, but my shotgun feels like wank. It doesn't really feel like a shotgun, more like a handheld mortar that shoots confetti in the hope that your enemy chokes to death from laughing. Maybe attachments will fix this, maybe it's gone the way of the irritating snipycunt, we'll see. Either way defending those fucking doors and windows is a lot harder when you have to shoot twice, trust me! A special mention goes to the sound. Apart from the doors sounding like it's the final of most-serious-door-remains-and-the-rest-are-turned-in-to-soup-cans therefore needing to sound like they really, really mean business when touched or even stroked, the sound is absolutely spot on. Soundwhoring is back and then some, I could defend my perfect-height obstacle perfectly when I could hear bad buys coming from a mile away, and which direction they were coming from. It's fantastic. As always with any CoD, it all boils down to connection. I'm a fucking shit player at the best of times (fuck you @TigerBurge, haha) but even I can pull a blackjack and fuck shit up one match, and then suck massive donkeyballs the next. There's zero consistency, and once the frustration starts setting in, it becomes a game of revenge, more frustration, more lame ass attempts at revenge, it just goes on and on as I spiral more and more in to negative KDRs. One small item I noticed is that in the scoreboard for TDM, it only shows how many kills anyone has, not their deaths. I can only assume that this is to protect the poor kids from getting the abuse they deserve for sucking balls, the poor fellas. Shame. Here are a couple of clips from my time playing this bullshit game, of course me being the irritating cunt I am they both involve grenades. Hey man, a saffer got a reputation to live up to. And one I'm sure @ChaosGladiator will love: Can't wait for release date to play more of this incessant whiny cunt filled bullshit. See you all online you cunts.

Preaching to the choir big boy. Why do you think I have a 34" monitor and A50s? I spend half my life on the bloody PS4/PC! Next time I'm in NotLondon I'll have a sit on one and see how it feels. It'll take a lot for me to overcome the gimmick aspect tbh.

Fuck sakes Philly you need to start speaking up more, we just donated 400 of the fucking things a few months ago.

Lookin' fly old boi 😎 I've gotta admit that after years of shrugging these things off as gimmicks, they're slowly growing on me. Very slowly. I very rarely read anything negative about them so they can't be that bad I guess. Maybe the millions of positive reviews are right and I'm wrong, I'm still on the fence though.