Diddums

Thank FUCK for that. Not gonna lie, walking around with nothing but retarded zombies as a threat was boring as fuck. Shall we promote the server too? Could be fun to get slaughtered. And die in the game, ofc.

So buy more ram. You have standards now, remember.

See? I spread my legs everywhere. Like a flower opening its petals to the gleeful sunshine on the first day of spring.

Leigh's fucking off with his family, the selfish cunt. We may have to rock on just the three of us, @crispymorgan you bought it yet?

What PL are the raids now? If it's over 650 this game can do one. If not, count me in.

70 and 120fps is a huge jump, I'd be very surprised if that's running at full capacity. This coupled with your inability to download Planetside 2 I'm inclined to say you may have a little gremlin somewhere. I'll Teamviewer in to your system this weekend and have a mooch around, probably something small like a driver.

Driveclub is a shambles, it deserves to go. I'm evidently not in the minority with this opinion otherwise this topic wouldn't exist. It suffers terribly from an identity crisis. Is it an arcade game? Is it a sim? It doesn't know what it wants to be. The driving is a bit sim-ish, the weather is pure sim and a benchmark for game weather systems as far as I'm concerned but the menus, unlock system, all arcade. Except there's no ability to upgrade your cars, which is another nail. The racing, whilst tight, is all over the place. Gran Turismo does racing right, it's still fun, has a million times more content, upgrades, etc. For arcade, GTA is pretty much top of the pile. It's a buggy, stuttery, shit graphics mess with physics that look like they were pulled from the 90s but it just works. It's not trying to be serious, it just takes the tools it has and fucks around, to a reasonable degree of success I'd say. Driveclub has always been a lost game, it was meant to be some kind of open world MMO type thing where you can visit each others' garages, roam the free world and challenge others, but it just didn't work, like any MMO type racing game hasn't (Test Drive anyone?). They cut all that and turned it in to a racing only game and whilst it's enough to keep some entertained, it was only a small element of a massive game. They removed the rest and suddenly the racing only aspect felt more like a PS2 game than a PS4 game. Glaring holes in the content, missing TONS of stuff to do, it's just... not all there.

They'll never get rid of the CD tray, you've got nothing to worry about. The price will remain the same too, except you'll get a cheaper "digital only" console, like the slims and Pros. There's too much revenue in physical content to get rid of it, think of other countries, not just the UK. Then there are those who like collecting, trading in, lending games, swapping, etc. It'd be a suicide for Xbox if they got rid of the physical element. Never gonna happen. That said, I have no idea why I'm even defending the most inferior console. Throw the fucking thing in the bin and your worries with it.

They're not discontinuing physical media though are they? From a global perspective that'd pretty much be RIP Xbox. Most of Africa, Asia, India, many don't have internet access but do have consoles, so I can't see them writing that market off any time soon.

You forgot the backstory. They've given the AUTHORITAH their plans for Notre Dame to be used to help rebuild the cathedral, and to help save their asses from the chopping block show their solidarity with the French they're giving out the game for free. You know, a 99p game. Because they're amazeballs like that.

Christ, where to start. We weren't well off in South Africa, in fact a computer was about as far out of reach for me then as a Chiron is today, but I managed to scrounge up whatever components I could from any source I could get them and eventually ended up with a working 386 with a monochrome monitor. This bad boy was my introduction to PC gaming and the hurdles I had to overcome (you have any idea how shit it was to build a PC back then? SCSI cables, jumpers, master / slave drives, DOS operating system, RAM sticks that had to be literally identical to work, drivers which were a complete and utter pain in the ass, remember, this was all offline so if you had the wrong driver you'd have to hop on your bicycle, go to a mate's place with internet, hope his internet works, download a tiny little file for about 3 hours, then copy it on to a floppy and hope to hell it still worked when you got home (floppies were unreliable as fuck). If the driver was still wrong you had to start all over again. it was like building a space ship back then) meant I grew some serious appreciation for it. I learned to code on it, the pinnacle of which was coding Snake by copying text from a magazine my cousin in the States used to send over with all his hand-me-down clothing. My aunt used to visit and give me loads of his old clothes and stuff and his magazines. Never had I experienced such excitement as when I got those magazines and together with those I learned how to code in Qbasic, as well as make batch files for DOS (which anyone of a certain age will know, remember autorun.bat? that was your PC's main batch file, the .bat suffix was short for batch). They were basically files which were lines of DOS command prompt commands, so you could literally automate your entire PC with them, or if you were naughty, give someone a floppy with a batch file on it which when ran would format their PC. The good ol' days. On this old 386 I started off with whatever I could find, mostly Commander Keen ( @McNasty I can't think of this game without thinking about you anymore, lol) and some other side scrollers, the names of which I can't remember right now, but those old demo floppies which came with magazines were like gold and shared primarily amongst the rich kids, occasionally I'd get one and this single 1.44mb floppy would have like 5 demos on it, it was unreal. Ah fuck, how could I forget Street Rod 2. There was a glitch in the game where you bought a specific used car and tuned it to a certain spec and it'd spank anything, so that was probably my first game cheat ever. Anyway... Word obviously got around about my keenness and ability in the PC world and my grandparents eventually commissioned a PC to be built for me by a man named Jan Meulen, I'll never forget that name, lovely old man, I wonder if he's still alive. Anyway, thanks to the funds my grandparents gave him, he built me a Pentium 120mhz with 16mb of RAM, in a case which would barely fit in the back of a van. That was my true love and would remain with me for many, many years. I played mostly demos, whatever I could get my hands on, until one day I had enough money to put a CDRom drive in my PC. I'll never forget it, it was a 4x drive, my mate had a 12x in his parents' 486 but my budget never went that far. The 4x was still great and opened up a whole new world because I could now start playing the demos on those CDRoms you used to get with magazines back then. A magazine then was like buying a PS4 game today, they were expensive as fuck (all imported, Saffrica didn't have much in terms of PC tech back then) and the magazines we bought were dictated by the demos that were on the CD. My old friend Kevin Pretorius and I used to share everything, we'd even chip in our money together to buy magazines and share the discs. Occasionally we'd buy a South African magazine but those discs always had shit games on them, they were mostly word processors, internet software, all the boring stuff. There was a flea market quite close to me which had some stalls that sold shareware games (remember those? No DRM, just enjoy our products!) on floppies, some of them having over 10 floppies per game (if I remember correctly, Blood was the record holder with 24 floppies, or was it Rise of the Triad? can't remember). They were fairly affordable and Kevin and I used to chip in and buy them together and copy the floppies at home. It would take a whole night to copy 10 floppies because the floppies we used were all shitty second hand, worn out, unreliable pieces of crap that others had consigned to the bins, but we weren't quitters, this was gold to us! Games I played thanks to these floppies and CDs were Blood, Doom, Wolfenstein (all of them), Heretic, Rise of the Triad, Test Drive, Stunts, Quake, GTA 1 (bought from my computing teacher at school, Mr Brandon Hill-Jowett, he had a loaner from one of his pupils and copied discs for us at a price of R50 each). Eventually I bought my first ever non-pirated game, Dark Reign for R50 or R150, can't remember, but my mom drove me about an hour each way to pick it up, came with box and everything. This was my first proper PC gaming experience. No piracy, no copying floppies, no nothing. It was also the first ever game I played which had a proper cutscene. Around the same time I also bought my first ever sound card which I guess also elevated that game to a whole new level. I played the everliving hell out of this game, until I eventually sussed out that by editing a file called units.txt, you could alter the properties of every unit in the game, so I had little puny soldiers one-shotting tanks from across the map and whatnot, this eventually killed the game for me. Then I moved to Holland and brought my PC with me, where it laid unused for a year or two because OMG NEW COUNTRY! Eventually I bought a new PC with the money I made from my paper round, it was an AMD Athlon 1600+ with I think 256mb of RAM. No graphics card mind you, but it was a start. This would eventually come with me to London, and right before I left I got what was then the most powerful graphics card for it, an Nvidia 6600GT. This thing was ridiculous. This was also during the time of torrents, Razor 1911 and TONS of other people all getting involved in this piracy boom, where games were literally everywhere you looked. You couldn't go past a friends' place without seeing at least a few Razor 1911 CDs lying next to their PC, often filled to the brim with not only the games, but also the software required to circumvent the very primitive (and offline, very important) DRM. We had all sorts of injectors, disc loaders / mounters, fake keys, hex key-generators, you name it, we had it all. We could install almost any game and get it to run without the disc, until Need for Speed came along. I think it was Most Wanted or Underground, can't remember, but this was the first game to put up a real fight. We had to use every trick in the book to get it to work but we got there in the end and the sight of that E46 M3 GTR, together with that awesome soundtrack, whilst the CD drive was empty, was the most amazing feeling ever. We felt like Acid Burn on Hackers, we were the fuckin' bznz. Anyway, played shitloads of these games and eventually moved to London and brought my PC with me, the whole screen of NFS went blurry when you hit the nitrous which coupled with my trusty 6600gt looked fucking awesome and I blew most people out the water with it. I should point out that in my entire gaming career until this point, I still didn't own a single console. My PC career died when I moved to London. It went from being a pasttime to being Plan B, Plan A being getting pissed, taking drugs, trying to shag everything I could, it was basically one long party from the moment I landed to the moment I woke up from being asleep on the couch on Tuesday the 9th of November 2006 at 2am in the morning to the sound of my cousins' girlfriend screaming. I opened the door and there was my cousin, who'd fashioned a noose from his bed sheets and killed himself. Party over. We all moved out, I lost my PC somewhere, and life was just a huge haze. Eventually having met and married Kyla I bought my first ever console, a PS2. It wasn't played much but the internet started playing a more pivotal role in my life and then the PS3 came out, and having seen all the shenanigans people were having online, I finally bought MW2. I got it towards the end of its career and joined on MW2forum to ask something about claymores, and from that point of view, the rest is history. I met some of my fondest friends on there who I'm still great friends with today, and most of them will be reading this. I played on console pretty much exclusively with this lot for years, eventually moving on to the PS4, a brief stint on the Xbox 360 inbetween and a massive WoW stint which almost cost me my marriage but I really can't be arsed talking about that, this was right after my counsins' suicide and I think I just happened to turn to the most addictive game the world has ever seen to try and deal with it. I was given some games a couple of years ago which highlighted just how old my 2500k was getting, @phil bottle bought me Star Citizen which instantly killed PC gaming again because it killed my poor 2500k to the point I could almost hear it crying as it was pumping out 2fps. Thanks to building @Plumbers Crack's PC recently however I managed to bag some high end stuff which has reinvigorated PC gaming for me, which coupled with the current crop of shit games on the PS4 means I'm pretty much back on PC now. For current games I'm enjoying a bit of WoW now and again, DayZ, Star Citizen, probably going to install BF4 this weekend. It's great having all that choice again. Does this mean consoles are dead to me? Hell no, I think I just got burned out on it, and in gaming in general, so only time will tell if that one game comes along and reunites us all again. It's nice to see some others jumping on the PC bandwagon too, @phil bottle has been trying to convince me to get back on for ages, @tronic44 is now a member of the master race, @Plumbers Crack has now joined us whether he likes it or not, @GazzaGarratt has finally got his shit together too, @crispymorgan has a beast of a PC now as well, so we're growing. Obviously the console is still connected and will be used quite a bit but for now I'm just enjoying playing games again. As for your question, yes I would get there in the end Modern Warfare 2, Black Ops, World of Warcraft, Black Ops 2, Destiny, Planetside 2, and many, many more, with hopefully many more to come! Well that got out of hand didn't it? If you have 10% of the fun reading it as I did writing it then it's all worthwhile I guess! Happy easter you bastards!

Hi, I'd like to post a little heartfelt tribute to Driveclub.

Tonight, tomorrow night, all day friday, whatevs mang.

It's a shit game. I could win if I wanted to, I just didn't want to embarrass all you sweaty tryhards.

Meh.

I love your stories Doc, always interesting. Please keep posting them. Have they determined the cause of death yet?

If you have the space and intend to do a bit of retro gaming now and then, I highly recommend an old CRT telly, always works. Can usually be had for pennies on Gumtree and Facebook.

Hahaha, Lee drinking it too was hilarious, i need to sort out my recording, that's gold right there. As an apology I topped up both yours and Philly's cars with petrol and water. I had to drink an entire jerry can of water before I could put petrol in it, took fucking ages. I parked the other one out of sight as it's also got all your shit in the boot.

Yeah, I've worked very hard for over a decade to build up such a well respected, well mannered, polite & helpful reputation. I ain't throwing that in the bin for fuck all.

SOMEONE_RES_LEIGH

I knew this was coming 😂

Yeah, we need a proper session on it, not a let's just appease Diddums so he shuts the fuck up and leaves us alone session. The problem is these people can't see past the subscription, but we can even move to a private server and ditch all that if we want. I'm going to nag them again and we can spend a night on it, I'll make a new dude as well so we're all on the same page. @crispymorgan @phil bottle @tronic44 @GazzaGarratt @Bluebear @Greboth

i-gAME_wITH_iDIOTS Or Im_With_Stupid Or Nothing_But_Disappointment Or OMG_Diddums_OMG Or OMG_MY_TEAM_IS_DEAD_LOL idk. whatevs.

If you even remotely like cars, you know. Trust me, you know. This video is good, but 5:10 highlights something every petrolhead will feel fairly strongly about: If you, like me, appreciate the finer arts, then naturally the internet has stepped up: So, repeat after me: POP POP POP UP AND DOWN HEADLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHTS!!!!!!!!!

Poor Zake, fella passed away a few years ago, fell off a balcony whilst on holiday