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RenFengge's 2021 Fitness PPR


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2/27/2021 Workout

Squat Workshop

Build to 90% 1 rep max.

 

10 sets of 3 at 90% (coach changed my weights halfway through.. because I swear he likes to watch me suffer. Detailed breakdown below)

 

Weight changes during the 10 sets:

Sets 1 - 5 @ 205lbs (90% rounded up 1 rep max)

Sets 6 - 8 @ 210lbs

Sets 9 and 10 @ 215lbs (95.5% 1 rep max)

 

Thoughts: Only 1 workout in this week. It was a major board week for me, so that just sucked the life out of me. Plus, since I blew a tire on like Sunday, couldn't get out of the house for my morning workout.

 

Today, when I got into the gym, Coach Tim was explaining what we were doing. I heard him say, "You guys will be doing 10 sets of 3 at your 90% 1 rep max."

 

I blurted out, "That sounds terrible. Oh, that came out of my mouth and didn't stay in my brain."

 

He laughed and said, "So, obviously, La knows exactly what we're doing. Do you want to explain?"

 

I said, "eehhhhhh... you mean that we're doing a riff from a Bulgarian squat program that has been done in CrossFit workshops? And, you decided to give us the worst day of the series right before we do deloading, then testing?"

 

Him, "BINGO! Let's get it!"

 

So, the only way for me to survive this was for me to slightly change my squat depth. I typically squat all the way down and very much below parallel. I decided to hit this at slightly below parallel to make sure I keep the tension and not relax in the hole. Dear lordy, I think I worked my thighs so much more doing that.

 

Right before set 6, Coach Tim was eyeballing my weights and said, "let's add more.. Not a lot. Just 2.5lbs on each side."

 

Me, "But why. It's not like the third rep is easy."

 

Him, "Your third rep isn't difficult enough."

 

Ehhhhhhhhhhh.. mmmkay.

 

At the end of set 8, he was pacing in front of my weights. I said, "You want me to go up by 5lbs again, don't you."

 

He said, "You know me too well."

 

That was a good, tough session. However, I prefer these types of sets lol. Good times.

 

As for my weight, I dropped below a certain pound threshold and am down 9lbs. I'll miss the month weigh in, but I'm happy and the weight will go as it goes.

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3/1/2021 Workout

5 Rounds:

  • 5 heavy strict press (adding weight each round) --> 65lbs, 75lbs, 76lbs, 76lbs, 76lbs
  • 10 kettlebell ballistic rows @ 35lbs pair

Bonus:

8 Rounds:

Tabata Push-ups Baseline/Challenge

 

Thoughts: This was a nice strength workout. I think I finished at the 12 minute mark. Somewhere around there.

 

I had full intention of just doing the strict press with an empty bar (45lbs). One of the coaches was doing the workout with us. He was right next to me. Once the timer started counting down, he said, "Are you going to add weight? It's supposed to be heavy." 

 

I said, "Yeah.. in the subsequent rounds."

 

He said, "Yeah... put the 10lbs on. You too, Sally!"

 

Sally and I looked at each other with looks of, "Why? Just why? But, we'll struggle together!"

 

The point of the heaviness was that no one should be able to just breeze through the rounds. You should need to take a rest. However, I'm usually just in survival mode lol.

 

It was a good workout. The third round was when it was getting difficult. I just wanted to do push presses. I ended up making each rep a power clean and strict press because I needed to put the bar down.

 

Oddly enough, the kettlebell ballistic rows were easy? Weird. But it was a good breather.

 

As for the Tabata push ups. I legit said, "I thought that was optional." Because, I thought it was! I don't sign up for the challenges. It's like added pressure to me lol.

 

So, 8 Tabata rounds led me to 62 push-ups. My upper body is smoked today. And, now I want to see a better number at the end of the month when we retest it. So, I guess it's going to be push-ups every other day at home...

 

Last thought. I'm officially down 10lbs since January 1. I'm 2lbs short for month weigh in. Unless those 2lbs magically disappear by tomorrow night via water weight or whatever. Shocking to me. I didn't think i would get this close after that mental space in the beginning of February. So, onward and forward. We'll do this the original Paleo way and not restrict. I do infinitely better, and I needed to be reminded of that.

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On 2/17/2021 at 3:47 PM, RenFengge said:

My food thoughts of late is my slippery slope down into anorexia world, and as I posted them each day, I recognized that. My performance last Saturday was an indication of that. I'm still trying to cut, but I am struggling this time around on finding a mental balance.

 

This is so where I get stuck in. My wife thinks I do not need to lose weight at all in anyway as its more about if I feel I want to feel better in my body its about toning, rather than losing weight although I feel the difference. Difficulty alongside fitness is how to change your food without losing the fun bits in life such as having a nice takeaway family meal together. I don't want those things to stop so it makes you feel like the easiset way around that is to just not eat as much in the week. However, I get so exhausted - do you try the same?

 

On 2/17/2021 at 10:30 PM, Middle Class Caveman said:

I think the problem with coaching in today’s age is that a lot of them are trying to fulfill the ‘want it now’ culture and so a timed weight loss goal is rather appealing to some. However, that isn’t how the body works. That’s just my opinion.

 

Want it now is absoultely bang on the money for EVERYTHING in the world right now. It tires me out seeing people tired and impatient for things. I get it, Covid exacerbates the issue as we don't want to feel like we're wasting our lives away but above all you can still be a realist through the can do positive attitudes to get up and get shit done. Right now, i'd like more time in life to enjoy all these fun things we do at a slower pace. Enjoy every moment kind of thing.

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42 minutes ago, GazzaGarratt said:

 

This is so where I get stuck in. My wife thinks I do not need to lose weight at all in anyway as its more about if I feel I want to feel better in my body its about toning, rather than losing weight although I feel the difference. Difficulty alongside fitness is how to change your food without losing the fun bits in life such as having a nice takeaway family meal together. I don't want those things to stop so it makes you feel like the easiset way around that is to just not eat as much in the week. However, I get so exhausted - do you try the same?

 

 

Want it now is absoultely bang on the money for EVERYTHING in the world right now. It tires me out seeing people tired and impatient for things. I get it, Covid exacerbates the issue as we don't want to feel like we're wasting our lives away but above all you can still be a realist through the can do positive attitudes to get up and get shit done. Right now, i'd like more time in life to enjoy all these fun things we do at a slower pace. Enjoy every moment kind of thing.


Exactly! 100% this!

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23 minutes ago, GazzaGarratt said:

This is so where I get stuck in. My wife thinks I do not need to lose weight at all in anyway as its more about if I feel I want to feel better in my body its about toning, rather than losing weight although I feel the difference. Difficulty alongside fitness is how to change your food without losing the fun bits in life such as having a nice takeaway family meal together. I don't want those things to stop so it makes you feel like the easiset way around that is to just not eat as much in the week. However, I get so exhausted - do you try the same?

 

Hm. Do I do the same? Not really. And, I'm going to speak from my best mental health days, which also happened to be my fittest days. (This is something I am getting back to currently)

 

Diets are... not a great thing. At all. I don't necessarily believe in diets. Because long term, they don't work. I think "protocols" that are 21 day/30 day long that are designed properly are building blocks. What does that mean? If at the end of your 21 days or your 30 days, you don't know how to live life without being on those super strict rules, then you learned nothing. If that protocol helped you figure out your trigger foods, your sensitive foods, and/or foods that just makes you feel better or worse, then use that as your foundation to figure out what works for you. People forget that not every guideline works for everyone. For example, I can't eat a banana without putting on like 2lbs the next day (which is probably from inflammation from eating it), but Carl can. I can eat rice without issue, but Carl cannot necessarily. I have people who can digest soy perfectly fine and meet their goals; I can only consume soy (because I love tofu) in moderation.

 

Now, when I'm at my best both mentally and physically, no, I do not necessarily restrict. You can't have a life and being on a "diet". It doesn't work. I make better choices. And, I find balance.

 

It was not until I really delved into the CrossFit/Paleo world that fitness and nutrition started to make sense. There's a sort of saying that "it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change." We talk about 80/20 (80% on point, 20% cheat). We talk about what works for us (I may lean heavily into Whole30 to see stark results or just to reset my taste buds, but I'll still have a piece of chocolate after a meal to signal my brain that I'm done eating).

 

The people who designed Whole30 don't do it all the time and changed their relationship with food. That's the biggest thing. You have to change your relationship with food.

 

I met up with a former co-worker on Saturday. When we worked together, he asked me for help in getting fit. I said I would, but he would have to pay attention and follow what I gave him. Do it for 30 days, then see how he feels.

 

It's been 4 years since then. Those 30 days, he learned what worked for him and what didn't. He ended up changing how he eats, but he never feels restricted. He found a workout regimen he enjoys.

 

@Middle Class Caveman  - works extensively with people on body comp and workouts. He has a much deeper understanding of what it takes.

 

TLDR --> Diets don't work. Lifestyle changes do. You need to find out what your body needs. Working with people who understand how food works makes a difference.

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The key's to success:

 

1. Find foods you enjoy and can rotate around that work towards your goal. Lean proteins, fruits and veggies, carbs and fats.

 

2. Find a way you LIKE to train. There is no right or wrong way. Movement is movement. Do that a lot. 

 

3. Measure your steps, the easiest way to burn excess calories is with steps as everyone can go for a walk. Want to burn some more calories and shed some fat, increase your steps by 1000 a day for a week and watch what it does.

 

Easy.

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3/3/2021 Workout

12 minute AMRAP

  • 6 dumb bell hang power cleans @ 45lb pair
  • 6 dumb bell front rack lunges @ 45lb pair
  • 6 knee ups

Thoughts: You ever go to a workout class and wonder "they know who I am right? Like, why why why?" That was my thought with the 45lb pair of dumb bells. 

 

Coach James saw my puzzled look when I got to my square and said, "You were easily power cleaning 175lbs on Saturday. 90lbs should be fine."

 

I said, "But... lunges..."

 

He said, "Oh, and your scale for toes-to-bar is knee ups. You're past leg raises."

 

I said, "But... survive?"

 

Overall, wasn't too terrible. But my hands. Oh, my hands. We've reached the stage of where I need to start taking care of calluses on my hands, so they can protect and not hurt. I thought I was the only one being a wuss about it. Nope. Haha.. Our top athlete said that it was doing the toes-to-bar halfway through was the hardest because it hurt!

 

Anyway. Fun story/discovery. As I finish up the last of my boxing package, I have found out that there's like a legit Eskrima/Arnis teacher in my town. Here's hoping he knows how to check his email... so I can get sessions. I would love to break the sticks out again and just get back to what I love learning.

 

Body weight note: I'm officially down 13.2 lbs since January 1 (I'm 10lbs away from where my body is typically happy at, so it gets even more difficult then). I actually made the February weigh in. But, yeah, how I typically eat when training and not worrying about the scale every other day is better for my mental health and leaning out. Almost in my old clothes from when I was working at a hedge fund. Then, it will be getting even leaner than that. Shooting for end of August now for overall goals due to a friend wanting to do something in October.

 

Good times. Good progress. Good things ahead. Here's to getting back into some combat martial arts and maybe some wall climbing for summer... on top of the next weightlifting workshop (squat cleans).

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5 hours ago, Middle Class Caveman said:

Pictures! We need pictures dammit. Right now all I’ve got is an image of Lucy Lui in my brain!

Like doing lifts? Maybe when I start the squat cleans workshop, I'll see about a video or something.

 

Or just because no one really knows what I look like? Hahaha.

 

Lucy Lui has a body frame where I might be terrified of breaking her just by lightly bumping into her. I am... not that lol.

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3 hours ago, Middle Class Caveman said:

That is not a fragile lady

FCCF735E-6F3B-43BF-AE80-8968B6E8BF0D.jpeg

 

Not at all! But my frame, even at the fittest is not pencil thin.

 

Look up Kristen Lim of CrossFit. That's more my frame at my fittest lol.  But, you know, change it a little as someone who likes their milkshakes and cakes very much. Hahah. 

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24 minutes ago, RenFengge said:

 

Not at all! But my frame, even at the fittest is not pencil thin.

 

Look up Kristen Lim of CrossFit. That's more my frame at my fittest lol.  But, you know, change it a little as someone who likes their milkshakes and cakes very much. Hahah. 


or we could just see a picture/video of you!!!!

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6 minutes ago, Middle Class Caveman said:


or we could just see a picture/video of you!!!!

 

Things that my friends constantly ask for but are denied --> To take my picture... 

 

hahahahahah

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3/6/2021 Workout

Squat Workshop

Front Squat focused:

Starting at 14 reps, descend by 2 to a heavy 2 rep max (195lbs).

 

Thoughts: Once upon a time, I thought nothing of front squats. I had no fear of front squats. Rack position wasn't a factor in how heavy I could front squat. Wrist strength wasn't a factor in how heavy I could front squat.

 

Sucks getting old.

 

Oh, how I wanted to just.let.go.of.the.bar. Not because I couldn't push myself to stand, but because my wrists were all "Lady, what are you doing? Why are you doing this to us?"

 

But, I pushed. I cried/squeaked/mildly screamed a little when standing at the final reps. Oh, my wrists. We need to to talk about your lack of strength.

 

Today's bonus was that one of the members brought his pair of black labradoodles to the gym. I love dogs. However, they seem to love me too much? Just kept trying to sniff and play with me while in-between sets.

 

We also had some hilarious banter at the gym today. Everything from sleeping positions to what do we sleep in at night to what do we like to drink... It was a weird day haha.

 

It's going to get warmer out soon... and the only thing on my mind besides getting some old guy to train me in Kali/Eskrima/Arnis... is to figure out if there's such a thing as a portable lifting platform... so I can actually practice certain lifts at home.

 

P.S. I half debated on taking photos or videos today. I also thought it would be funny if I just took a photo of the dogs instead. But, oh wells!

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2 hours ago, RenFengge said:

3/6/2021 Workout

Squat Workshop

Front Squat focused:

Starting at 14 reps, descend by 2 to a heavy 2 rep max (195lbs).

 

Thoughts: Once upon a time, I thought nothing of front squats. I had no fear of front squats. Rack position wasn't a factor in how heavy I could front squat. Wrist strength wasn't a factor in how heavy I could front squat.

 

Sucks getting old.

 

Oh, how I wanted to just.let.go.of.the.bar. Not because I couldn't push myself to stand, but because my wrists were all "Lady, what are you doing? Why are you doing this to us?"

 

But, I pushed. I cried/squeaked/mildly screamed a little when standing at the final reps. Oh, my wrists. We need to to talk about your lack of strength.

 

Today's bonus was that one of the members brought his pair of black labradoodles to the gym. I love dogs. However, they seem to love me too much? Just kept trying to sniff and play with me while in-between sets.

 

We also had some hilarious banter at the gym today. Everything from sleeping positions to what do we sleep in at night to what do we like to drink... It was a weird day haha.

 

It's going to get warmer out soon... and the only thing on my mind besides getting some old guy to train me in Kali/Eskrima/Arnis... is to figure out if there's such a thing as a portable lifting platform... so I can actually practice certain lifts at home.

 

P.S. I half debated on taking photos or videos today. I also thought it would be funny if I just took a photo of the dogs instead. But, oh wells!


I find this so strange. People look at you everyday. A video is you. You don’t look any different. It’s you. 

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2 hours ago, Middle Class Caveman said:


I find this so strange. People look at you everyday. A video is you. You don’t look any different. It’s you. 

 

So, in my current mental state of trying to accept myself more and face my own issues head on... this is probably going to be a first in trying to explain this to someone who isn't 1) a therapist, and 2) a fellow person who suffers from such mental anguish.

 

(Fair warning for those who are reading, this is going to be a serious post. (TLDR at the bottom)

 

Before I get into trying to explain something that I rarely talk about with anyone who hasn't had to deal with this, let me drop this Tumblr link, which explains a lot of this very well: 

tumblr_lggclx6bQH1qee9tro1_500.jpg
MISSPIXNMIX.TUMBLR.COM

I DO NOT HAVE AN EATING DISORDER P01 I’ve been having some pretty intense internal arguments about whether or not to start posting this, but finally bit the bullet. Last year I was diagnosed with...

 

 

I will start with that one of the major blessings for me during the pandemic is the requirement to be fully "masked up". No one can really see my face. Just my eyes. I can hide in baggy clothes and gym clothes basically all the time. I can stay home indefinitely. Sure, I'm an introvert. But, the feeling of constantly being judged for how I look, if I look nice or good enough, if I meet the basic standards of what people deem "sort of attractive", that pressure has been mostly gone for the last year.

 

I am basically the only girl/woman in my family in my generation. I have 9 cousins in my generation, all guys. I grew up in a very Asian culture where the best affirmation a girl could get wasn't if she was top of her class (I was from kindergarten and up to third year in HS) or given sports awards (I collected a few because I enjoyed baseball), but if she was considered pretty. From having the perfect straight hair, to the perfect light complexion, to the whitest and straightest teeth, to the perfect nose, to the smallest waist. I was put in a few beauty pageants to please my mother, and all it did was have people pick out my physical flaws. My jaw not being narrow enough. My cheeks being too full. My height never being tall enough. My photos never being good enough and still being judged on appearance when I was not even there.

 

My "skinniest" days was during a time when being a size 6 (which is approximately a 28" waist) still was not good enough for the matriarchs in my family. This was long before I got into actual fitness. So, it was just really rarely eating and being near skin and bones, but still having a friend who would give me a sandwich and makes sure I ate it during lunch period.

 

I struggle with my own body image. I see a photo of myself and can point out a million and one flaws. A photo of me existing for other people that I do not deem "decent" enough is terrifying to me. Because it means I can be judged whenever. Unlike if I see someone in real life, my appearance is just a fleeting thing for that moment. Not something to be taken for judgment later.

 

However, that is not to say that photos do not exist of me lol. A very select and curated amount of photos exist, with a handful of terrible looking ones of me, which only like, my closest friends have. My friend actually took 2 really really terrible photos of me today when I visited her, and her son wouldn't leave me alone. He just wanted to sit on my lap while I read him a book. The photos are terrible. But, I also know that she won't post them, and she also understands my mental space.

 

So, TLDR --> I have body dysmorphia issues mixed with lingering ED issues. The Tumblr comic explains what it is like (at a more severe case). Photos of me circulating scare the hell out of me because it means people judging me indefinitely instead of during the few moments I am with them IRL. I combat falling straight down an ED hole by knowing I need to fuel myself for performance.

 

Side note: every so often, I do think, "hey, I look not half bad today" and might take a selfie.. This is only a recent development.

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How I see it is that no one is pressured to share or say anything they want to. I would still value you as being an amazing FGer whether you did or didn't share your pictures so never feel like we would ask. I think its one where this place seems to create a safe haven for most of us that we don't feel pressured to share stuff. Its never easy sharing stuff, so for you to share something like what you just did, makes me respect you even more so.

 

Keep doing you, La. You've been a revelation since you've been around the place, supporting people, gathering the troops for raids and I really enjoy all your discussion points. We're with you all the way mate, you've got this 👊

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Thanks, @GazzaGarratt and @Plumbers Crack .

 

(TLDR at the bottom; plus two comics from the Tumblr to help those understand my anxiety on photos)

 

I wanted to take the time to address mental health and my own issues that have plagued me since... I can remember. The thing is, yeah, it's difficult to talk about. The non-fun stuff is, right? And, as a society, especially here in the US, we don't really ever address mental health. So, anything in that realm still carries a heavy stigma. Talking about mental health helps to normalize it. No one really thinks differently if we say something like "I have COPD/Diabetes/hypertension/etc." But, the moment the mention of anything regarding mental health comes along, it's "No. I don't want to hear it. Just stop being ______ and be normal."

 

So, the post was more than just adding to the discussion in the thread. It was to let anyone in our own community know that they aren't alone.

 

I have coped in my own ways for so long. I actually mentioned to a therapist last October that I don't know what or who I am if my general extreme apathy was no longer with me. I care about a very few things. I don't care about a whole lot of other things. Apathy is my coping mechanism for almost anything.

 

We all have issues. We all have things we need to come to terms with regarding ourselves. I am not my PTSD, my depression, my ED, or my body dysmorphia. I am not the traumas that happened to me that pushed me into combat martial arts. However, and this is coming from someone who basically always chooses to "forget" and "bury" to "move on" with life, if you can't easily talk about what's going on or what previously happened, then you can't really heal. For example, it took me at least 15 years to come to terms with a certain word that I still don't like to say or type. It took 2 terrible relationships for me to really sit down and hash it out with a friend as to why I was okay (but not) about staying in them until it took 1) my friends basically intervening and 2) cops being involved. But, it really wasn't until I was honest with myself and others before I could be... this person I am now. The weird, quirky, food loving, give basically no-shits, person that Carl knows me as.

 

So, if someone wants to ask me a question about basically anything and that question is coming from genuine curiosity and not malicious and ignorant, I'm more than happy to explain it. I hold that rule with my colleagues at work... and anyone who knows me.

 

TLDR --> We can't grow as a human society if we pretend things don't exist. Same for a person. You can't heal and move on if you can't talk about it... especially in a safe place.

 

Comics:

image.thumb.png.4b3e43368dd5fed4c9b367d0f01cff4a.png

 

image.thumb.png.05c5142facf2c680881c3d4b6ee3f023.png

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3/8/2021 Workout

5 Rounds:

  • 12 dumb bell squat cleans (45lb pair)
  • 250m row

 

Bonus:

8 Rounds:

Tabata Push-ups 

 

Thoughts: Sometimes, I wonder if my coaches are trying to throw me off my game. I walked in, then was told to go to a different square.. more... inside the class as opposed to my square that is on the outskirts.

 

I thought to myself before walking in, "This should be fine. It's a good workout. I hate cardio, but there's lifting... and we don't have to go heavy. Maybe like, 15lb pair. Pure cardio. Right? My traps are sore anyway. And, it was a high-carb day yesterday."

 

Then, Coach Liz puts me in a different box. I said, "You mean the other box right? My second usual box?" I said this as I saw a lighter weight in the other box lol.

 

She said, "Nope. You're in the front left box today."

 

Mmkay. Maybe we'll just change the weights later? After the warm up?

 

Did the warm up, which I always laugh about because it's a workout in itself. Then, she was checking in on everyone with weights. Coach James was working out with us this morning and was in the box in front of me. Coach Liz said, "Everyone good with weights?" She looks at me.

 

I said, "Maybe something lighter?"

 

Coach Liz and Coach James paused and stared. Coach James said, "See. The problem with going to the squat workshops is that now everyone knows you can squat over 250lbs... and we've seen you squat clean at least 145lbs when you've dropped the bar on Saturdays."

 

Coach Liz, "Go lighter, she says. Hah! Such a joker over there."

 

Me, "But... hopes and dreams? And.. cardio?"

 

So, did the workout. Really hated all the cardio while I was doing it. But, still glad I did it. When I did my final pull on the rower, I unstrapped my feet and just plopped on the floor, gasping for air.

 

But, the fun didn't stop! Because, TABATA push-ups for 8 rounds.

 

Last time we did it, I didn't necessarily understand why people rested face down on the floor. Oh, I totally did this time. My goal was to do 7 - 8 pushups each round... Helps me just not quit. My upper body is a bit toast today.

 

We cooled down, sterilized everything, and went on home. I walked out the door and saw basically the perfect emoji for today's workout. Some apathy mixed with some tears and a slight relief of getting it done.

image.png.df45df2da5f03afb250972fffde21672.png

 

 

 

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11 minutes ago, Plumbers Crack said:

Showed my son your post La and he said to ask you if you've encountered FRAN? Means absolutely sod all to me!

 

Oh she has, F that WOD.

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17 minutes ago, Plumbers Crack said:

Showed my son your post La and he said to ask you if you've encountered FRAN? Means absolutely sod all to me!

 

 

Hah! Yeah. Fran is one of my favorites. I have a handful of favorite movements (thrusters, wall balls, squats, sit ups). Most things involving those, I'll enjoy. Note that the first three in that list is almost the same movement lol.

 

I actively avoid Murph. If your son really wants to talk, then he needs to tell me his Murph time hahahaha. (I hate running.. it's why I avoid Murph)

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7 minutes ago, RenFengge said:

 

Hah! Yeah. Fran is one of my favorites. I have a handful of favorite movements (thrusters, wall balls, squats, sit ups). Most things involving those, I'll enjoy. Note that the first three in that list is almost the same movement lol.

 

I actively avoid Murph. If your son really wants to talk, then he needs to tell me his Murph time hahahaha. (I hate running.. it's why I avoid Murph)

Murph has been explained to me. He can't honestly remember his best time as it was  6 or 7 years ago but it was sub 1 hour.

 

His latest challenge with some friends is a 4 mile run every 4 hours for 48 hours and no cheating running 8 miles and having longer recovery...every run starts exactly 4 hours after the previous run started! Madness!

plumberscracknewsiggimpupdated.jpg


Thanks to Capn_Underpants for the artwork
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