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Just Cal

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Everything posted by Just Cal

  1. Just Cal
    Not at all! I just wanted to take a shot at Adam. Who by the way if he's reading this, hasn't come to Dublin like he said. Unless he did and ditched me
  2. Just Cal
    The Wii U kicks both their asses. PC too. Wii U master race!
  3. Just Cal
    I'll be able to try in about an hour man, stupid real life responsibilities......
  4. Just Cal
    nevermind xD
  5. Just Cal
    One of the mainstream solutions floating around for fixing an overweight bod is to stop eating so much. This has been proved wrong over the years thanks to charity appeals. You can clearly see that the starving children have big swollen bellies. This isn't because of a condition called Kwashiorkor as the media would have you believe. It all comes down to "fat gene". Fat people have a not-so-micro-organism called Gene that lives in the bowels of your bod. This fella has a bakery in with him that works like a.....bakery. So no matter how much you diet or stick your finger down your throat, Gene will continue baking cakes. Hence, you stay fat. Sorry. Onto the baldness. The ideal method to keep long flowing lockes or to even grow it back (thought it was impossible didn't ya?) is too rub semen into your scalp while repeating the word "Flubblegump" over and over for at least 25 minutes. Qualified professional answer: You can never truly lose weight and......semen
  6. Just Cal
    I'll try this when I get home. Will report back in about 3 hours
  7. Just Cal
    Oh Adam.......
  8. Just Cal
    It's why I'm here friend.
  9. Just Cal
    Tip: The clothes shops and Barbers dotted around San Andreas don't allow you to take out a weapon so you can't rob them. False. If you aim at the clerk from just outside the front door, they cower and allow you to enter with any weapon drawn. You can then proceed to shoot the cash register and take the irony-ridden bag with $ written on it. May I recommend Suburban. They have 3 registers. Ponsonbys' register cannot be opened. Even with sticky bombs and RPGs. I've tried.
  10. Just Cal
    Most doctors or sensible people would recommend a cream that I cannot link to because wisely, I never looked into it. I recommend a nail file for the job. You can file down the unwanted bumps to optimal size to keep them stylish. If you for some reason want to get rid of them, a Gillette turbo power razor will do the job. It's a lazy method though as it only takes 0.70 seconds to remove 1 wart. Qualified professional answer: Nail file.
  11. Just Cal
    Do you need advice? Want to ask an Irishman his thoughts on world matters or even just what haircut to get? This is where you can ask those questions. I specialise in relationship advice as I recently became single in the past 6 months. So ask me questions and I'll make sure to give you the best answers with the worst advice.
  12. Just Cal
    *Mark recommended this thread. I don't know how he knew but lets go....* Cal's tips on necrophilia 1 - Make sure they're ready: Before you venture down the road of necrophilia, you need to make sure your new partner is actually dead. You can accomplish this by putting your thumb in the rectum. If they are alive, they might get pissed off. If they don't flinch then you're all set to start. You could skip the testing stage by getting a shovel (or a JCB if you're really looking to party) and heading to your local hotspot. This could be a graveyard or even a retirement home if you're the patient type. 2 - Find a romantic spot: You could be the naturist type and go at it there and then but if you want to keep it intimate, I'd suggest finding a nice secluded place. A lot of people make the mistake of bringing them home for coffee. DON'T do this. The smell of.......intimacy mixed with rotting flesh can cause a dip in the sensual mood. Find a romantic abandoned warehouse or derelict house. Maybe go back to their place? It's not like they're using anyway. 3 - Set the mood: Some incense goes a long way. I recommend lavender. 4 - Prepare yourselves: KY or Smuckers will allow you and your partner have fun without that horrible chafing feeling. Your new lady/boy friend isn't in a position to get......moist, without a helping hand. 5 - Be prepared for the break-up: Your new partners hygiene might start to get to you so always keep your options open. Keep an eye on the obituary pages in the newspaper. You never know, your high school crush who you were never good enough for might get hit by a car. Bitch can't say no now.... 6 - Go at it like a rabbit and a dead hare: You're ready now for some intimacy. Remember to clean up accordingly after fun-time is over (remember the hygiene) 7 - The actual break-up: You now need to let them down lightly. Dig a fresh hole and gently lower them into it (you were in love once). You could also bring them back to their grave but the po-po might be watching. 8 - Rinse and repeat *This is by no means a real guide and I don't condone sticking your wick into the dead community. It's wrong man.
  13. Just Cal
    So has anyone tried this challenge yet? I've a few clips, just haven't watched back through them. I still haven't escaped though.
  14. Just Cal
    God damn you Arris....... Spoilers aren't too bad for me personally if they don't give away the story. At least now I know the reward for getting 100% I probably would have not tried for it but I definitely will now. Cheers man You can still fix it before more people see!
  15. Just Cal
    I'm so fucking glad I went to the last page of unread hahahahaha
  16. Just Cal
    I like the twitter feed. I have an account but rarely use it. I do tag @foreverrgaming in my YouTube videos. I'm not sure if it helps the account get followers or not but I like to think it helps. Status updates are still useless IMO. As someone said above, if people don't want to read your PPR, they probably couldn't care about your status (not directed at anyone, just in context)
  17. Just Cal
    It says I'm a member anyway. <3
  18. Just Cal
    lol Never mind. Egotisti_Cal is my name on there. I'll request another now. EDIT: It says I'm a member though. Fucking site is overloaded.
  19. Just Cal
    I'm in!!! The whole system isn't very user friendly haha
  20. Just Cal
    I had to request another invite. Unless you invited me already? I don't see any notifications though
  21. Just Cal
    So I spotted this at the summit of Mount Chiliad and my cat died. Now people have gone up after the story is finished but nothing happened. Maybe it's a 100% thing? All I know is that Google don't even know. Take note of the strange blood-red emblem hidden under the decking.
  22. Just Cal
    Too true
  23. Just Cal
    You's lads know that each character has a specific garage where you can store 4 cars and special cars? Also check the impound lot.
  24. Just Cal
    Not a useful tip but a fucking funny one. After making your character jump, press O (punch) to make them ragdoll. If you do this into a locked car, you smash the window and set the alarm off. Then you can wait for it to stop before entering said car. *for best results, use off of high drops or even a small staircase.
  25. Just Cal
    No rush Mike! The amount of people trying to use the site keeps crashing it. The in-game photo uploader keeps crashing too.
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