It's a bit of a sad read but here's the advice I an offer. Don't know what you know about me, here a short description
- I'm 50 years old , happily married, I have a 18 year old son and a 17 year old daughter
- I'm and PhD in Electrical engineering and I run my own consulting company
I met my wife through a professional introduction service. I wasn't particularly shy but I just didn't have the time or the will to go do the bar scene and waste my time with women that were not going to be compatible. It's probably the best money I ever spent. I met a number of women through the service. Some became friends. I also found my wife.
Since you seem to be introverted try to use a similar service and find someone slightly extroverted. If she has friends, you now have friends. You might even make friends with their boyfriends/husbands
When people invite you to go for a drink, go. You don't have to drink alcohol. Hell you might even volunteer to be the designated driver since you don't drink. Don't know about the UK, but that means free drinks in a lot of bars in Ottawa. It might also make you popular if you don't mind driving the other drunks around. It also makes you look responsible which might attract some of the ladies.